Darkness

Dearest Ones,

"Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own understanding. In all your ways know Him, and He will direct your paths." -Proverbs 3:5

We have all experienced times of darkness in prayer. What do you do when God seems absent? St. Paul tells us it is possible to have joy and peace right in the middle of darkness, or when God seems to have disappeared. God is directing our paths and that is all that matters. You don't have to worry about tomorrow or yesterday. Even when we can't figure things out, we can be happy. After all, we don't need to know everything - trying to figure things out will only wear you out. But if you trust God for the answers, you will enjoy His rest and His peace.

What if we have prayed, attended church services, obeyed the commandments and still God seems totally quiet. Questions come to my mind when this happens - like: What did I do to deserve this? God must be mad at me. Does God even exist? Is this the way God treats his faithful servants? Nothing makes sense. At times like this, I need to keep saying, " trust in the Lord with all your heart." Although I don't understand all that happens, I must keep on believing, continuing to serve and keep on surrendering myself daily to God.

So what else can one do to endure the spiritual darkness, when God seems so far away? I must convince myself that God is in the darkness; He isn't mad at me at all, rather, this shows that He can trust me. He's pleased with me. Didn't Jesus go through times of darkness, when He was nearly in despair? He thought His Father abandoned him. What you and I go through is so very small compared to His darkness and pain. Darkness gives us a chance to share in the life of Jesus, which is the reason we are on this earth.

So many people must be in darkness all the time. The hungry, the homeless and the jobless must feel God has surely abandoned them. People all around us are suffering - not only from lack of food, but from words of comfort or a gentle hug. Many are spiritually poor. They feel deeply the loneliness, abandonment and despair that comes from isolation. If I reject them, I am rejecting God Himself. As the song goes, "You're the only Jesus some will ever know..." Look around...someone needs you.

Jesus longs for our love with all His heart. Imagine that you are a parent and you have satisfied your child with all his needs, and now that same child rejects you. This must have been the way Jesus felt as He hung on the cross and how He feels today, as He sees so many people turn away from Him or totally ignore Him. How He longs for our love.

When God seems far away, it helps me to remember that God is making me a saint. Great saints went through the darkness. During the last three years of her life, St. Therese felt as if there was no God at all. She even doubted if there was a heaven. Through all these doubts, she never stopped encouraging those around her in the faith. God rewarded her faith by making her a great saint. St. Jane Frances DeChantel experienced doubts about her faith for the last forty years of her life and yet, she too, never let that interfere with her love for the poor.

If God trusts me enough to allow me to enter into His passion, I must trust Him. How can I be His follower, if I don't imitate Him? Like Jesus, we must keep going, confident that we are pleasing God, even though we don't feel it. That's what faith is - believing what we don't feel. Smiling when we don't feel like it and loving when it is so hard.

"Dear Jesus, You made me for some purpose. If I do any good, please don't let me know about it because this will keep me humble and keep me from being puffed up and proud. Here I am - take my voice, my mind, my hands, my feet and my heart because you gave them to me in the first place. I give them back to you. Help me to use them for your glory. Fill my heart with your love and forgiveness. And help me in the darkness, to remember that you love me, no matter what happens. I can do all things in You, who strengthens me. Amen."

With peace and love,

Sister Francelle